Next important tool in overcoming premature ejaculation and learning to last longer is breathing.
Remember how you breath during lovemaking. Ordinarily, men’s breath becomes erratic, frequent and shallow, especially when they reach higher levels. This way of breathing activates fight or flight mode in one’s body. Consequently, it makes one to come faster.
When breathing in a regular and deep pattern our nervous system moves into calming, rest and digest mode. This state is will make you last longer even if you do not use any other techniques! Here is the most simple way of breathing to help with premature ejaculation. It works perfectly during sex or any stressful situation.
Count to 4 on inhale and count to 4 on exhale.
As simple as this. You do not need to hold breath between inhalation and exhalation. While adding retention between the breaths will further increase calming effect, this is not a must and can be laborious during lovemaking.
You will need to practice this breathing during sex and whenever you can during the day. It takes some time to get used to it. Furthermore, during lovemaking you will be carried away by feelings, emotions and thoughts, which will distract you from breathing in correct way. Hence the more you practice the more easily it will be to maintain this breath rhythm.
My suggestion would be to practice this breathing from the very beginning of penetration, even when you are still far from point of no return. Keep your background awareness on the breath. If you realize that you forgot about breathing, just re-start it without much dialog in your mind.
Now, you have two extremely important tools in your arsenal in lasting longer in bed:
- Awareness of the arousal levels, and
- Breathing technique.
In the next post, I will speak about third important tool: Kegel and Reverse Kegel.
Keep practicing and stay positive!